LJ:ohh yeah, I've walked him, partial bed bath, changed the sheets. He is doing good, itching to get his catheter out, NG tube out and start on clears as he hasn't had anything to eat in 3 days-
Med student:(cuts me off) -ok, thanks, I'm glad he had a good night. I'll go see him
(I follow behind, hang out in room with med student to observe)
Med student:..... Yada yada yada so have you been tolerating your diet okay? Pain with urination?
Patient:are you fucking retarded? I have a god damn tube shoved up my nose into my gut preventing me from tolerating any "diet" and a tube shoved so far up my cock I think the tip of it is probably touching the end of the one in my stomach. My only pain this morning-and all these mornings-are you med students who show up and read info from a page like a script! Look at me! Not your papers! Also, pay attention to LJ- she even set you up perfectly outside the door- I heard her tell you I had a catheter and NG, JUST INCASE YOU COULDNT, YA KNOW, SEE IT HANGING FROM MY FUCKING FACE